One Fun Nun or One Fun Columnist?

I will be a featured columnist for the Milwaukee Catholic Herald's special insert geared toward young adults. It is called My Faith. For this issue they had asked me to rework a previous blog entry about transitioning and time for God, etc.
Here is the link: http://www.chnonline.org/main.asp?SectionID=24&SubSectionID=21&ArticleID=180&TM=85326.7

The next column will be in May...I'll keep you posted (ha ha no pun intended).

Ciao, Ciao!

Oil Lamps

Oil lamp--that became my image. The image that I had (all by myself!) after attending my first Giving Voice gathering January '07.

An oil lamp can theoretically burn continuously as long as the oil is replenished. Oil lamps give off significant amounts of light and more heat than a candle. They are used in many ritual and steeped with great symbolism. Oil lamps have a place in history and are often mentioned in Scripture.

Oil lamp...my image for a gathering of Women Religious, all under 40 continues to be present and vivid for me. It is becoming a profound symbol for my continued call to love as a woman religious. Theoretically, I can burn and burn continuously; as long as my oil is replenished from time to time. The "oil" changes; sometimes it's ministry, community life, deepening relationships, growing in my self, Giving Voice...there are so many sources for "fuel" of my call and my commitment.

The wick is my commitment to this life; my congregation, my sisters who have paved the road before me, who walk with me today, and who I will walk with into the future. Community is at the heart of my commitment, my call to live this life. My sustaining energy is fueled through my commitment to love in this way.

I am the flame. Burning with passion for relationships, integrity, justice, and mission. The nature of an oil lamp allows for the flame to vary in it's intensity. Sometimes I need more fuel; other times I am so saturated that my flame is out of control. A flame's existence in an oil lamp is dependant upon the wick and the oil. If a flame goes out, it is a matter of refueling rather than discarding and beginning again.

And God...well God is the bowl, the glass, the lamp. The fuel, the wick, the flame can't exist without God. God surrounds, contains, offers support and is conditional for existence.

Two scripture quotes jumped out at me when I was searching for some inspiration with the image that keeps on imaging. The first was 2 Samuel 22:29 "For you are my lamp, Yahweh. Yahweh will light up my darkness." The second, Exodus 27:20 "You shall command the children of Israel, that they bring to you pure olive oil beaten for the light, to cause a lamp to burn continually."

The first was is great, but my reaction is more, "Aw...that's nice. DUH." I still like it but the juices weren't flowing. Now citation from Exodus struck me, especially after my weekend with Giving Voice. If I take out the "You shall command" part (which makes me cringe) and reframe the meaning of "children", it struck me that the younger members of the itinerant community were in charge of bringing the fuel for the light--a light which was supposed to burn continually.

We, among the youngest religious women in the country, were "in charge" of bringing the fuel to this gathering. Bringing the fuel together to better understand, build bridges, develop relationships...all to ignite a passion and deep love for our commitment. Without it, this lamp could not burn continually. Wowie.

I want to blog about my weekend with Giving Voice, post the crazy pictures and tell some of the stories. I will do that this coming weekend. I'm so wiped out (reentry is exhausting!)

For now...I need to sit with my oil lamp and be grateful that I have been refueled.

Snow Fun...a retreat day...and a New Year's Eve party

Yikes...here I go getting behind again--seriously...New Year's eve?? C'mon Katy...let's get back with the program here.

It's 11:00p.m. and I've finished packing for my trip to Florida tomorrow! There's good news and not so good news. Good news--Florida, 80's, sun, ocean, fun, prayer, time with some of my other "young nun" friends. Not-so-good news--My plane leaves at 6:00am YES IT LEAVES AT 6:00!!! I have to be to the airport by five which means, rolling out of bed at 4:20 to get into the car by 4:32 AM. It's crazy...but I can sleep on the plane.

Okie dokie...I still have to finish my posting from Christmas vacation. We had a wonderful snow over break. It was big fluffy flakes and wet heavy snow...perfect for Snowperson building. So I announced to the Sisters I live with, "Who wants to build a snow person with me?" After a few chuckles...I had two takers: Phyllis and Deb (Deb pretends she doesn't like cold and winter, but I think she secretly loves it. She's even smiling in some of the pictures! ) Look at all of that beautiful snow! I LOVE this kind of winter!

Here's a nice shot of Phyllis, Deb, and me after her figure was constructed. And below she's getting a little face lift.

Finally...our hard snowy work or hard snowy play as I see it. Isn't she cute??? We named her Sis.

Now...to the right is Sis' most recent picture. Please avert thine eyes if you are easily startled by Snowperson transformation. Poor Sis; this is what we call a major melt-down! Ba dum bum...

Onto my other Christmas vacation occurrences...I just may finish with Christmas break and then be able to update you on the beginning of the next school semester before my Easter break!

One of the best things I did over Christmas was take a retreat day for myself. Remember that whole balance/integration/yadda yadda whohah that I'm always talking about??? Well...I did it. I knew I needed some SPACE and I knew I wouldn't take it if I were at home (way too many things to distract me). So I went to my spiritual director's studio (not only is she a fantastic spiritual director she is a phenomenal artist!) for the day and retreated. It was WONDERFUL--not necessarily in the clouds open, clarity floats into my being, and I leave accomplishing everything I wanted to in 6 hours kind of wonderful (Hmm...do you think maybe sometimes I set unrealistic goals??) but wonderful in the sense that I knew if I didn't take some Katy/God time I was headed for my own type of melt down. So...there you have it Yay for me. (Ok...I'm totally laughing at myself as I type this...it's great how I can write about something that happened almost a month ago with such positivity!)

It was just a one day-er; so I didn't bring a lot of stuff-just my mandala journal (and colored pencils) and my regular writing journal. Stella has all of these cool little cards and stones with words on them...usually I get to pick one at the end of our session and that's my focus word for the month. So I started by picking one; I'm a super tangible person so these little tangible reminders that that darn spirit is always working is good for me. I do my little angel cards at home most nights before I go to bed. Anyway...SO I PICKED the DARN STONE that said, "Release" on it. When those things happen, I usually try to put the stone back before Stella sees it, considering she wasn't there...I was stuck with it. Can we say SPIRIT?

Then I put on some nice music and I wrote in my journal for a little bit to remind myself why I was there (sometimes I have to set goals for my time...yes I'm weird and I own it.) Then it was time to go on a little journey.

The weather was a great winter day (now...I like most aspects of winter so this isn't a stretch for me); sun shining, brisk but comfortable temperatures in the upper 20's. I went for a LONG walk. I didn't even take my mp3 along...I couldn't my head was spinning as it was; sometimes I can't even do the music thing. So I walked and I walked and I walked like I was on some mission. I don't think I could even tell you what I was thinking about, but I was walking and thinking. I ate some lunch and grabbed a mocha at a coffee house and walked back to the studio.

I got into the studio and I grabbed a BIG, and I mean HUGE, piece of white paper and I started drawing in the center. At first I didn't know what to draw (and I'm not supposed to think about the outcome; so I had to remind myself of my little "Get out of your head" rules.) and then I started drawing my own face. Now...I'm an AWFUL artist so this was an interesting process; I figured if this thing had green eyes, red glasses, brown hair with some funky streaks, and freckles I could make the case that it was some abstract representation of me.

So I finished that and I looked at it and thought...now what? I have a terrible attempt at a self portrait starting at me. So I refreshed the music selection and saw my little release rock on the table and rolled my eyes and said, "FINE." And I started writing...and writing...and writing...I wrote about lots of different things. Literally if it popped in my head it went down on the paper; the first whole spiral was me writing about writing and not "editing" my thoughts. :)

I started at my little face drawing and wrote in a spiral around and around and around until I didn't have anything else to write. I told myself if it popped into my head, it was going on the paper, even if it didn't make sense or flow. I used purple which is always my color for God/Divine and red because that's my power and passion color. I filled up a good portion of this HUGE paper with these concentric spirals. When I was finished writing...I looked at it from a distance and all I could see was my silly face drawing and these red and purple circles swirling around. After that I was completely exhausted and I took a nap! Emptying everything you've carried around for the last few months (somethings I wrote down were things I hadn't thought about for a few years!) is exhausting.

I woke up from my nap and I still had about 30 minutes before Stella came for our meeting. I guess I was glad that I wrote all of what had been swirling around in my head, but it also was overwhelming. I am not sure where to go with this or what to do with it and that is always frustrating for me--I like to have all the answers and have them 15 steps ahead. I've been praying and working with this big huge piece of paper since my retreat day. I guess I would have to say it was a good thing to do; and good does not mean easy.

Sr. Mary Ann always uses the "spit in your soup" image (mmm yummy)--once you know someone has spit in your soup, it's not going to be the same. Even if you wish you didn't know in the first place! This is another one of those spit in my soup times (woo hoo..blech, ick ick) I guess. It's ALL there, at least what was swimming around in my cranial soup that day. Thanks Spirit...thanks for spitting...AGAIN.

So yes...my retreat day was wonderful; I guess. I received no clarity, worked out a plan of action for myself, figured out everything I need to do to move on...etc. I left with ONE GIANT word mandala and a lot to think about. Thank God for retreat days; I guess.

AND FINALLY...the end of my Christmas Vacation....NEW YEAR'S PARTY!

I had the wonderful pleasure of spending a few days with two of my favorite people: Srs. Mary Ann and Jeanne! It was a very lovely couple days...low key, relaxing, sleeping late, taking naps, played a little cards, chatted a bit, had delicious Chicago pizza--seriously it was delightful; exactly what my spirit needed for a couple days.

For New Year's Eve, we had a party! They invited Sr. Kathy over for snackies, prayer, chatting, and games. It was great! Sr. Kathy brought a lovely prayer service for us that was really moving. I have been using it since for my night time thinking time. Then we were telling stories and sharing memories until we realized that it was almost time for the New Year! Well...obviously this is the Adventures of One Fun Nun is it not? So what's a party without party favors? Aw...doesn't Sr. Kathy look great? Personally, I love the tiara.

Here are the three of us crazy ladies..and a lovely one of me and Sr. Jeanne! Fun, good cheer, nice sharing was had by all. Happy New Year!

It was great ringing in the New Year with Jeanne, Mary Ann and Kathy! Yeeehah...hello 2008!

Well folks...that catches you up for the year 2007. When I return from Florida at my Giving Voice conference, I'm sure I'll have much to report on. Peace out!