Reflective, quiet time has been a struggle since I've been struck with major soul malaise (see post). In fact, my spiritual director said I should announce a "snit"...an absence of requiring myself and "should-ing" myself into my normal patterns and expectations of prayer. Let God meet me where I'm at kinda thing. So people...I'm in a SNIT and approved and ready to activate SNIT.
I was gifted with a glorious, crisp, sunny autumn day and some time to wander. I found the beauty comforting and the time and space to think somewhat healing. It dawned on me that it was the feast of All Saints (11-1-11); part of my snit is not including liturgical prayer. I love liturgy; it's one of my most favorite expressions of prayer. It speaks to me of COMMUNITY and coming together. I've lived community, been the living body of Christ, being Eucharist to those with whom I encounter in ministry and community life. Part of my soul malaise is experiencing deep pain in being in community situations. It pierces me deeply; inconsolable pain. Going to Mass was not going to happen for me this All Saints. Feeling the guilt and then remembering my spiritual director's advice to let God meet me where I'm at formed a sense of calm and invitation to "create a chapel" in the space I'm in--physically, spiritually, psychologically. This Haiku emerged:
Create a chapel--
Embracing silence, beauty
God met me in me.
I only had my cell phone to take pictures and thanks to perfect light conditions and the most vibrant colors I've ever seen...I got some great shots. Nothing fancy, but some are really cool. I of course put it to music which touches into where I'm at too. This piece is called "Breakable" by Ingrid Michaelson.
To my Saints...thank you for your prayerful guidance. To my Souls...I pray for you. To my God...thank you for meeting me inside of me. I continue to hold on to the thread...